Modern lore dictates the team I have followed from Day 1 this season is the largest fan base in the world. “So what?” echoes the average American sports fan with his head buried online busy reading up on Kobe Bryant and Dale Earnhardt, Jr., that he has no idea that virtually every country in the world watched the exact same match that I watched today at Fiddler’s Elbow with my Aussie friend, George.
I am speaking of course of the fabled Manchester United Football Club, or MUFC.
Keep in mind that while I am writing this, I am envisioning and actually speaking the words with an English accent, as I have been hearing the games announced all season on many football/soccer channels, and quite frankly, it’s the way they should be announced: with fervor and perfect dictation, not to mention RAW and sheer excitement in the delivery of God’s greatest language!
What an electric game to watch! Millions of televisions the world over gathered to observe Cristiano Ronaldo place a header in at the 26th minute, on an absolutely BRILLIANT play set up by the Ginger Ninja, Paul Scholes and Wes Brown. It worked perfectly, but of course it did, Ronaldo is only the best player in the world! A few minutes later, there was some miscommunication in the goal box and bad luck for the Red Devils, the Blues equalized in the 44th minute with a goal for Chelsea. I guess Man U was just thinking about sinking their teeth into their halftime oranges, eh?
The second half begins, and it’s all about Chelsea and a lethargic effort of offense by Man U. At this point, Chelsea had about 17 shots on goal totally overpowering Man U’s 7 shots on goal. There were only about 6 Chelsea fans in the pub, and a good many 30 to 40 Man U fans, decked out in the red and white. It kind of reminded me of a Utah-BYU game, actually. The onslaught of goals continued until the 90th minute and stoppage began. There were furious amounts of substitutions as we geared up for the inevitable.
Much to my dismay (and many others at that), UEFA have eliminated the Golden Goal overtime, and have opted for 2 15-minute periods and THEN penalty kicks for their Championship program.
After several minutes of strategies backfiring on both ends, there was a scuffle between both teams. Wes Brown and Carlos Tevez were backed into a corner by several Chelsea players and Didier Drogba, Chelsea’s best player and death striker, made an asinine move and slapped Wes Brown. Sorry mate, you can’t do that. It’s against the rules. Drogba was hit with a Red Card (Vive le Zidane!) and tossed from the pitch to watch his team from the locker room.
2 overtimes are through. Break out some more oranges and Evian!
We go to penalty kicks and Cristiano Ronaldo does something utterly tragic and tried to fake the keeper and Cech guesses right and stops Ronaldo. It’s 4 to 5 and Chelsea’s captain, John Terry just has to make one goal and the title is Chelseas’s…
He slips and falls on his approach and the ball goes wide right off the post!!!
The momentum has switched and Man U breaks in Giggs and Nani’s goal, and Edwin Van Der Sar the mammoth goalkeeper for Manchester United guesses right on Anelka’s poor showing in the bottom left corner and sends it sailing out!
Manchester United wins the UEFA Championship, 6-5p over Chelsea!
Glory, Glory Man United!
The Premier League Champions and UEFA Champions as they seal the Double and become Champions of Europe again!
Tune in next year as I break it down bit by bit and introduce you to the amazing sport of football as it’s meant to be played!
And for your viewing pleasure, I give you the most famous announcer in the world…I just don’t know his name.
http://youtube.com/watch?v=ghSaZkwetRw
