Non-Trad College Freshman

Welcome back to the Mayhem!!!

2010-12-16T12:31:00.000-08:00

For the better part of the last 3 months, I’ve been neck deep in textbooks, articles, and diverse dissertations among social scientists. The class I learned the most from was POLS 2070, an upper division political science class that discussed diversity and US politics.
During that time, I’ve learned about “Lies my Teacher Told Me,” and I thought I’d share a few new revelations. So sit back, grab yourself a slice of good ol’ American apple pie and some chocolate milk. This should be at the very least, entertaining, brow-raising and educational. There’s also the chance you might vomit a little bit. So read on, if you dare, to learn some controversial truths about our United States of America.

Thomas Jefferson was “inspired” to write the Declaration of Independence, claiming that “all men are created equal.” He was so inspired that he probably forgot all about those 175 slaves he owned back on his homestead of Monticello, Virginia. I’m guessing he didn’t think much of his ownership of other living people since his property ballooned up to 225 people at the peak of his slave ownership. Monticello, Virginia, I’ve been there and it’s nothing short of beautiful. I have newfound respect for those who made it such.

I learned that Christopher Columbus was an a-hole. Oh, and a rapist and murderer. Instead of giving the 10,000 gold that was promised to the first man to spot land on his voyage to find the back passage to the West Indies, he selfishly claimed it for himself, saying he saw a man walking with a torch of fire along the shore the night before. Right, when you were 80 miles off land, you saw a guy carrying a torch? That makes sense. Because he was “the People’s Hero,” Columbus supervised, allowed and instructed the killings of about 500,000 indigenous people in the 10 years the Spanish were making trips back and forth from Europe in the name of the Spanish crown. If the indigenous, who would gladly give of all their substance wouldn’t bring him what he wanted, Columbus would chop off their arms, especially if they didn’t bring enough gold. How compassionate. Good thing we don’t have a holiday named after this Grade AAA clown.

In another lecture, I learned that African-Americans couldn’t get interest-earning bank accounts until the 1980s. Their money was better off left under their mattresses or sock drawers. They couldn’t pass any savings along to the next generations, because there were not safe places to house extra cash. Did you know that when a black family moves into a pre-dominantly white neighborhood, the home values drop 3 to 4 percent in a year? “Redlining” is a real and common practice. These acts are still observed in 75 percent of real estate laws under the Federal Housing Administration.
One million black GIs returning from World War II were stifled and shocked when they couldn’t move into neighborhoods after they had just secured the beaches of far away lands while the USA claimed victory. Blacks felt as if they had been shafted once again, the first time coming just after the Civil War concluded. Abraham Lincoln promised every former black slave “40 acres and a mule” if they served in the Northern Army and swore to fend off the powerful Southern troops. When the North won, and Lincoln was assassinated, Andrew Johnson had all the power in his hands, and could have really united this country for the better. Instead of making good on Lincoln’s promise, Johnson’s inaction made him one of the USA’s most terrible and ineffective presidents of all-time by choosing not to honor his predecessor’s promise to all black men throughout the country.

**That anecdote reminds me of Isildur in Lord of the Rings: He has the power to banish evil for all-time, yet he lets the power go straight to his head, and he ultimately pays the price by not getting anything done under his administration.**

Way to go, powerful White Americans! Now I begin to understand why minorities hate white people so much. Here’s a fun fact: White Americans will be the minorities by the year 2035. Now I can laugh at the comment my former boss used to say all the time, “Why can’t they just learn English? No one is ever going to need to learn Spanish.” It’s good to know I don’t have to work for people who possess such narrow-minded traits.

I read firsthand accounts of border patrolmen lining up headshots on Mexicans and other Latin Americans on sight. The border patrol are trying to prevent the influx of immigrants who want to come to the United States for better opportunities, much like the patrols’ white ancestors did through Ellis Island. Only back then, certain races weren’t allowed to go through that port. Asians: nope (reference the Johnson-Reed Immigration Act: effectively banning Asian immigration from 1924 to 1965.) Mexicans: no. African-Americans: no, for the most part, excused if they were slaves or indentured servants. And of course, Arabs: no. Some things never change. Never mind that Europeans wiped out tens of millions of indigenous people that engaged in “awfully disgusting practices” such as bathing, sharing crops, and prohibiting private property. Surely, we as European Americans would not stoop so low as to the hideous and primitive habit of actually grooming ourselves.

And here’s one more, just for kicks and giggles.
When Adolf Hitler and his Third Reich were declaring the parameters to which the Germans, Polish, French and all under their rule would live by, they didn’t “write the book” on Eugenics or racial science. Nope, they went back to the good old annals of American literature and science. Thomas Jefferson and Louis Agassiz, contemporaries in the early 1800s wrote about the differences between the different peoples of the world: Slaves from Africa, men from the East Orient, those of European descent. How else to rule the peasants with superiority? Why, create the idea of race, of course! By creating a social agenda and putting yourself at the top of it because you have all the money and power, you can create a rift between people just by suggesting, “There really is something different about these people.”
Something tells me Thomas Jefferson was incredibly vexed at the end of the day. This man’s accomplishments were truly remarkable. Here he was promoting freedom, liberty and democracy on one hand, and a system of slavery and exploitation of non-white peoples with the other. Maybe Two-Face wasn’t just a DC comic book character in Batman. Maybe Jefferson’s ambiguous antics inspired this Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde character in the mid 1900s.

You can read all about how the idea of RACE and its origins appeared in, “Notes on the State of Virginia” by Thomas Jefferson. TJ will tell you all the reasons why blacks are inferior to whites, and might even convince you that “Homo sapiens Europaeus were much more enlightened than other peoples of this world, and therefore, loved by God on a greater level.”
“What a bunch of crap,” I say, but then, men like Jefferson have been elevated by historians, put on the grandest pedestal, and therefore ought to not be slandered or have their intellectual output challenged.

If the 3rd president of the United States wrote it, then it must be true. Truth is, Thomas Jefferson was an egomaniac, and an “Enlightened” jerk. If he really did receive inspiration from a divine source to create the Declaration of Independence, I’d imagine he lost his seat on the express train to heaven by following up the D of I by “creating race” and becoming the world’s first racist. All in an attempt to create even more reason to have “superior people” immigrate to the United States. Way to go, douche canoe!
Not only did Jefferson get bumped from my list of all-time favorite historical figures, he did a body slam down all 105 flights of stairs. Gone baby gone. Now, Teddy Roosevelt is climbing the ranks, even if he was the one that suggested a death tax on inheritances. Stupid estate tax!
In the long run, it seems we got a fair deal from the Nazis. We gave them the intellectual property of eugenics to justify killing 6 million Jews in World War II, and they gave us the concept of freeways and interstates. I’d imagine Hitler probably picked up a few other ideas on how to wipe out and displace countless generations of people from their native lands as well from US history.

That information was from five different lectures, just for starters. A sliver of information I received this semester. Like Neo, I ‘took the red pill’ and made the plunge, just to see how deep the rabbit hole goes.
Articles, antiquated journal entries from historians, and research papers have enlightened my world and caused massive rifts throughout the memory channels of my brain. It’s completely ironic that capitalism and colonization have brought so much terror upon those peoples who lived on the American continent since the late 15th century and have been massacred, yet the USA is the exemplary country that so many others applaud. I mean, hey: we made the first Constitution. We had the power to VOTE, (minor details regarding the fact that only 37% of those living in the Colonies at that time actually possessed that right).

You have to admit, our history is pretty messed up. Columbus didn’t “discover” the American continent. Those living here knew where they lived. Even in their “savage, primitive and backwards” minds.
At the end of each class in Diversity and US Politics, it was almost as if Paul Harvey was in the background. Telling us like he did so famously saying, “And that, is the rest of the story.”

Here are some of the book titles and articles which I studied this semester:

“The Truth about the First Thanksgiving” from Lies My Teacher Told Me by James Loewen
“Notes on the State of Virginia” by Thomas Jefferson

“The Plan of Creation in the Animal Kingdom” by Louis Agassiz

“White Man’s Burden” by Rudyard Kipling

*“The White Use of Blacks in America” by Dan Levy, circa 1971

“The People’s History of the United States” by Howard Zinn

“Never Meant to Survive” by Aimee Sands

Federal Housing Administration, circa 1930

*Banned book in many states

Human Resources Department

2009-11-03T17:19:00.000-08:00

November 3, 2009

Dear Prospective Employer,

Thank you for the opportunity for me to come in and review the requirements needed to apply for your job. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to see the inner workings of your company and for exposing the faulty foundation that is known as your Human Resources Department. Thank you for showing your true colors and true ideals, and not your so-called virtues and accurate façade of elevated self-perception.

I applaud you in not giving me the job that I so wholly qualified for, and I thank you for not appreciating the vigor, sense and passion that is needed to do the job as it needs to be done correctly. Thank you for keeping me from the insidious backbiting and inner turmoil that is presented at a Friday morning meeting that requires cheerleading and trivial incentives to help me meet the quota that will require selling my fresh soul for that $15 per hour, just to make the Department Head look viable and successful.

How dare you, Spiteful and soulless entity, try and take away a chance for an extraordinary individual such as I to be true to myself in preserving the option to serve others that deserve my unhindered power and vivacity to work hard, my gusto and punch in seeing the world come to a balance, and to create results of a different matter, a matter of greater importance! How dare you remove a sliver of possible providence to one who needs a course correction that only I can steer them toward?

How dare you, mischievous sprite, try and squeeze my rare intellect into the glass box of darkness and squiggly arrows, pointing to a land of retirement, 401(k), and have me cling to a hope that my life will mean more when I’m 70 than it does to this day. How dare you pull the wool over mine eyes so that I may not feel the work I’ve been made to endure, to earn an honest wage, that I would be trapped by a false sense and purpose in achieving the intangible feelings the Almighty dollar so pertinently exudes as it eats away at one’s destiny come Friday morning, only to be filled with a monstrous remorse and the feeling of a nutrition-starved stomach the following Monday, as you would have me creep in like a caffeine-imbibing drone and nicotine-dependent zombie.

You shall not touch me again, dastardly fiend! I will prove you herewith, that only under my circumstances will we again meet at that stone table to discuss the issues and affairs I see fit to navigate with your help. Until then, begone immoral and shameful pretender! Off with you, false prophet!

Sincerely,

Yours Truly

Manchester United vs Barcelona UEFA CL 05-27-09

2009-05-21T10:05:00.000-07:00

I absitively posolutely CANNOT wait for this game coming up next Wednesday!
For Barcelona, you have Lionel Messi the Magician, a 5'7 145 finesse controlled player that compares to the likes of Diego Marradona, and Messi is only 21 years old!

And in the opposite corner, the powerful yet precise winger for Manchester United Cristiano Ronaldo, 6'1 175 Portuguese sniper who is the current Ballon d'Or (World MVP) and best player for the World Club/Premier League Champions/UEFA Champions League Defending Champions Manchester United, a team I have been following religiously for the last 2 amazing seasons.

Tune in at 1245 MST on ESPN on May 27, 2009 to watch what players, writers, coaches and all of Earth's fandom are saying will be the best Champions League Final EVER!

Glory Glory Man United!

BCS: You know the money will come

2009-01-08T12:54:00.000-08:00

Having chosen this topic, I have to point out the fact that what I want in this case, does not indeed matter because money will always talk louder than the wants of a mountain man that happens to be a fan of the greatest football team of 2008: The University of Utah Runnin' Utes.
I don't understand why we don't have a playoff system in place. In what other sport does going undefeated NOT mark you as the champion?

USC: Give me a break. You lost to Oregon State, and we beat them. Negative 20 points and go to the back of the line.

Alabama: We crushed you like Miyagi crushes a grape. Get out of my sight.

Oklahoma: You were beaten by Texas, and Bob Stoops is a fathead. Don't ask me what kind of favors he had to perform for the BCS to bring him in. This is a PG rated blog, so don't even try to enlighten me.

Texas: You were beaten by Texas Tech, but I still think you should have been in the running even though you barely beat Ohio State.

Penn State: You lost to an unranked Iowa team. 'Nuff said.

Boise State: Sure, you had a great season. But when you play Cal Poly Tech State, no one cares.

Florida: We should have played you for the Championship. You will be representing the #2 team in the nation behind the Utes tonight. Let the magic of Percy Harvin, Tim Tebow and the greatest coaching job in the NCAA of Urban Meyer hold sway and destroy those silly Sooners.

BYU, Boise State and other Cinderella schools listen up! The fact Utah has busted the BCS twice now and haven't had a shot at the title is a complete sham. We have gone undefeated twice in the last 5 years, and they won't let us duke it out with the big boys. The BCS should be ashamed of themselves. You would think all that money would do something in the way of fairness and provide all 119 schools with a legit shot at #1, not just the popular 66 teams.

Mr President of the BCS: YOU SUCK! Even President-Elect Obama KNOWS we should have a playoff. March Madness is HUGE! Now just get rid of the 42 day hiatus for the preparations of a bowl game and let's do this!

Sixteen team playoff. That's 4 weeks, and we can even give the title game a two week preparation like the Super Bowl. Someone needs to explain this to me AND Kyle Whittingham why it won't work. Get off your collective fat butts and get this going into overdrive!
The College football playoff system will be so AWESOME! What are you waiting for?

Push Along!

2008-11-05T07:44:00.000-08:00

I am an anonymous political bystander who has elevated thoughts roll through his head just asking to be inspired by a higher power and when prompted, I feel the greatest achievement when I can transcribe these thoughts to paper.
Just the evening prior, a man named Barack Obama was elected 44th President of the United States of America. He is the first African American to hold this title, and as a registered Independent, I voted for him in both the Primaries and yesterday’s election. I am happy to see the literal face of change in the government. There are more women and people of different ancestry than Europeans that are in the Senate, House and the White House. I find it wonderful and beautiful that my country is reaching into the corners of the world to extract such people that can bring about change and usher in democracy in new ways, perhaps better than what has been done in the past few decades.
Having said that, I wish to press upon a more local issue, and that would be the stake of the mindset of the LDS Saints. Just over 150 years ago, the LDS faith carried itself over the plains and fields of the Midwest in order to escape harsh judgment and unethical treatment of its people. They found the Great Salt Lake Valley, and they have been able to prosper ever since. We sought refuge from people who judged us because of our beliefs. These people were even willing to put us to death because of the way we lived our lives.
I would tell the generation of my people, those who profess to follow Christ through their daily affirmations and actions: Thou shalt not whine.

We have the knowledge of the Gospel in our lives, and you mean to tell me that you think the future leader of our country, even Barack Hussein Obama is “The Anti-Christ”? What have you done? You have suggested a tyrannical name for a man who has not even been tested. You compare him to Stalin, Lenin and Hitler because he wants the best for everyone in his country?
Can you truly call yourself a disciple of Jesus Christ when you judge a man for works he has not even committed? If so, I am truly ashamed of you, and of what you represent. In times of despair, instead of lashing out against someone you hardly know, who you don’t know that much about, you hit your knees in the evening and you pray that God will direct our President’s affairs, and that he will find that guiding light that we all look for in our lives to make the most important decisions that affect us all!
Obama is NOT a Muslim, he was baptized in the Trinity Church in Chicago in 1998. He is an educated, wonderful person. And who are YOU to say that he isn’t?
I think it’s time that we all do as my sophomore basketball coach suggested and, “Quit whining and telling me that you CAN’T do it, and get out there and do as you have been asked. And no bellyaching!”
We belong to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. I want to hear people talk about a bright outlook and hear that we can foster strength in our children against tough times, and that we can shore up our sails against tumultuous winds and storms because of our FAITH in the Gospel.
I wish to hear no more of Anti-Christs, assassinations so that our country may become free. The man has not even been tested yet, and I am hearing FOUL things from the mouths of Saints concerning the welfare of our next President.
Surely our prophets will not lead us astray, and if you do not listen to me, then for all that is good and holy in this world, listen to THEM! We should not judge those who do not deserve harsh judgments, lest we become just like those who would push us away because of our “different” beliefs. Honestly my people let us once again renew our faith and wish the best for our leaders. There is a REASON he has been elected. You cannot dismiss him because he chooses a different path, and who knows what kind of influence he may have in spreading democracy around the world. Let us pay our tithing, and if our country asks us to give more, then we should, and seek to find the good in these works, in fact we can help our neighbors all around us.
Let us celebrate our democracy and stop complaining. I don’t want to hear whining from those people, just do as you have always done and put your shoulder to the wheel and push along for all of heaven’s sake!

-Kevin B Wright

In Every Day He Wakes

2008-10-14T17:21:00.000-07:00

I know...I was an idiot in 2000

2008-09-04T13:04:00.000-07:00

I especially like the bumper sticker I consistently notice driving through the townships in the SL Valley: If you aren't pissed off, you are clearly not paying attention. Bush Campaign 2000-2008.

I regret to announce that I did indeed vote for George W Bush in 2000. I didn't know anything about Al Gore, except that I found it funny that he kept reminding us that he invented the Internet. I just thought that maybe since George HW Bush had done a decent enough job at the White House, his son might echo his works in legacy. Boy, was I wrong. I think that Dubya may be the dumbest president we've had to date, only slightly more dumb than Dan Quayle, and that's saying a LOT. Our President has made the USA more isolated than at any time previous in the history of our great nation. His wannabe replacement, John McCain and his pet pitbull with lipstick (Palin) scare me even more. Yes, she did refer to herself as a pitbull. With lipstick. Leno, O'Brien and Letterman were all thanking the heavens after that quip.
McCain and Palin say they love this country. I say "Bull@#$%!" Maybe more like America in the 1950's. They are holding onto the Good Ole Boy system and will not let go. All I heard last night was one-liners of sarcasm, finger pointing and hatred. Palin thinks the biggest problem in the country right now is Barack Obama. Maybe she should get out of the hockey arena and start travelling to the Lower 48 every once in a while. I got a text from my uber-conservative friend now living in Chicago last night immediately following Palin's speech and he said he was impressed. I was NOT impressed, however, and I think that people like Sarah Palin are going to destroy this country. She sure knew how to divide herself from anyone respectable. Did you hear one positive aspect of her opponent? Does she have any idea that once he wins, her son that is slated to leave for the war, will be calling Obama his Commander-in-Chief and that she will have to support him? Talk about burning bridges from the get-go.

I believe that we need to change or reshape the face of the United States of America. For example, I don't believe that leaders, men or women, have the right to tell a woman what she can or can't do with her own body, even if it means having an abortion. We DO NOT KNOW when life really begins for these babies, and that's beside the point. It is NOT free agency when we tell someone what they can or can't do. Let the women make their choices, it's theirs to make. The devil tells us what we have to do, not our leaders. Our true leaders give us a choice. I don't want to have my wife or sisters go through abortions, but I will respect the rights of my countrywomen to have and make that choice. Gun rights? Absolutely. Tax increase? Yes. As long as those taxes go to programs vested in our country, and not some bullshit war in Iraq that we currently dump $10 billion into every month. I pay a price to live in this country, so taxes do not bother me. World Police? Nope. I care for those in other countries, especially in war-torn Africa where I have spent a great deal of time, work and money, building back up what terrorists have destroyed. But it's enough that we have to police EVERYONE that does not stand up to our policies. Let us be done with it. Like the great Ike Eisenhower warned us, "In signing the Constitution, we did not end that great script with "And they lived happily ever after". Why do we struggle with the idea of losing our superpowers to China? Everyone else has had a turn, and we have to put soldiers everywhere just to ensure our pockets get fatter so we can keep building bigger companies to monopolize the world with.

McCain/Palin will be an interesting bit to watch. As Scott T of Billings Montana said, "I suppose Palin does help McCain if all we Americans cared about was rallying around the flag, fighting the big war on terrorism and now engaging in a cultural war on the eastern elites. Palin and McCain can rant and rave about all that until the cows come home. But, at the end of the day I have to sit down at my kitchen table and figure out how I am going to put food on the table, pay my bills, put gas in my car and hope I do not get sick as I cannot afford too. I have not heard one word offered on stage at the Republican convention that addresses the issues I face at the end of every day at my kitchen table. But with that giant American flag waving behind their podium every night, why would they even care about me and all the other millions of Americans sitting at our kitchen tables staring at our pay stubs?"

I like Obama. I like community organizers. I like change. I don't care if he is muslim, Christian, Hare Krishna. I don't have to have someone who runs for President of a country that chooses to recognize freedom of religion be of my own faith to choose him as my leader. Heaven will be full of people that most of my neighbors don't want to see, and frankly, they will wonder just how the hell they got there in the first place since they weren't American, or Republican, or LDS, or God fearing people. Is there any way at all we can just keep the good things in life, and toss out the dross and become refined once again...only this time, ALL will be invited to the dinner table; The gay, the black, the Muslim, the gay black Muslim, the white, the American Indian, the poor and oppressed, the mother who had an abortion, the mother who chose to keep her baby, the rich and pompous and all of the rest of us that fall into these categories deserve to be treated like EQUALS.

We ALL need a good wake-up call. I will give my reasons for voting for Obama later. But now, all we need is change. Let us foster it in, and prepare ourselves for a LOT of work ahead of us.

Trifectal Ambrosia

2008-07-06T22:38:00.000-07:00

If it had been asked of me earlier this week that there was a magic mystical location that had the trifectal ambrosia of trout diet of cicadas, salmonflies and green drakes, I would have politely guffawed and been on my merry way. I know that I blog such as this is utterly worthless without pictures, but I can assure you, there were many witnesses to the day and to the illuminations in the water breaking the surface for our emergers and illustrious dry flies.
The illuminations were nothing but pure 100% brown trout, the foreign yet unsubdued salmonid of Europa. These fine dragons of the deep graced our presence with brilliant hues and tantalizing red smudges that looked as if the great Tomerelli had painted them himself, encircled by faint blue halos that were lost in a sea of mustard clouds and indiscriminate marks careening for the caudal tail.
A perfect 75 degree morning favored us as we partook of the holy breakfast toast my lovely had created for all of us, and after some debate of which stream to dapple and entice thus fishes, we chose the high road. Lakes full of crystal clear yet freezing water popped up left and right as we made the ascent into the holy land of trout. Not sixty seconds had passed after the careful choosing of our destination did my lovely simply inquire, “What kind of bug is THAT?” as a plump and delicious salmonfly proceeded to hide away under the park bench when Leaky saw it and stifled a laugh, which to me sounded more like he was passing wind and softly cried with pleasure.
A perfect specimen to behold, the size of a hummingbird, this oversized stonefly danced awkwardly across the stream only to be swallowed by the pines surrounding the river corridor.
We knew it, like it had been told to us before, the success of the day and the pursuit of trout was accomplished, that this was a day for constant re-telling, yet we had only to fish it first!
As we made the way towards a tiny confluence, we noticed the green demon lurking under the clouds, and re-appearing before our very eyes to reveal its tiger striped body and ever bulging eyes as Leaky exclaimed in a loud rant, “Green Drake!” Two TOI’s (secret fly pattern)later, we had the run of a lifetime, each picking up a dozen trout apiece and laughing all the while, addressing the chance that karma had tossed our way. With the drones of cicadas in the willows, we continued upstream and onward in our hunt for the Von Behr and Loch Leven, whichever they may be.
I took time to silently express gratitude to Poseidon for the fate of the perfect water temperature, showing respect for Zeus for sparking the emergence of the hatch thanks to the cloudy sky, Hopi the wind god to send a calm breeze down on us, and Fortuna for blessing us with a downpour of splashy hungry trout.
A good day between heaven and earth, and it almost seemed to transcend the difference betwixt us, as we made our way back to the car, and left me highly anticipating the keyboard to stroke the keys in an attempt to re-create the day…

A day in the life of a man after work

2008-06-08T00:25:00.000-07:00

What is it about writing itself that is so cathartic? If I’m in a mood that is generally displeasing, there is something so soothing about the idea of sitting down in a nice leather chair, kicking my feet under the desk and commence to giving my fingers, forearms and wrists a good workout while I pound this electronic apparatus and take out the grievances of the day on it.

Today was a good day at work. And it was a day of recognition in most circumstances. Only, it was also a day that would forever calm my questions of what, why, when and how long till…and I guess I should be happy that all of my questions, concerns and desperate cries of staring at the ceiling at night have been answered with a many good resolutions.

It’s just that…transition is so deceiving sometimes. It feels good to have an idea in your mind that things will eventually work themselves out, and when we are shooting for the moon and envisioning ourselves out past the stars, we quickly (and humbly) forget the journey we took to get to this hailed milepost of life.

I am currently overlooking the transition right now, and seeing myself in more favorable digs, apparatus and intellectual conscientiousness as I allow my imagination to creep in for a bit and give me a taste of “what could be”…and I like it. What is most important at this time is to overlook the wheres, the whats, the whys and just break it down to the least common denominator: how.

And how? By doing what you’ve been doing this past year. Working hard with no thought of reward save only the biweekly paycheck which allows you to pursue other interests of life and therefore give you purpose, insight, and passion for the things we neither see nor hear but are constantly searching after. This of course is...truth. But truth comes in many forms, and some of these things, we just can't find. It's part of the earth experience. Some things just cannot be accomplished. And it drives the soul of person CRAZY to know it can't have what it thinks it wants!!!

This, of course, is the pursuit of all humankind. I just have a feeling, that it is WAY beyond our comprehension to know exactly WHAT we are chasing after…

Glory, Glory Man United!

2008-05-21T23:37:00.000-07:00

Well it has been far too long, and I have much to write about, but I want to dedicate this post to a sports team.
Modern lore dictates the team I have followed from Day 1 this season is the largest fan base in the world. “So what?” echoes the average American sports fan with his head buried online busy reading up on Kobe Bryant and Dale Earnhardt, Jr., that he has no idea that virtually every country in the world watched the exact same match that I watched today at Fiddler’s Elbow with my Aussie friend, George.

I am speaking of course of the fabled Manchester United Football Club, or MUFC.

Keep in mind that while I am writing this, I am envisioning and actually speaking the words with an English accent, as I have been hearing the games announced all season on many football/soccer channels, and quite frankly, it’s the way they should be announced: with fervor and perfect dictation, not to mention RAW and sheer excitement in the delivery of God’s greatest language!

What an electric game to watch! Millions of televisions the world over gathered to observe Cristiano Ronaldo place a header in at the 26th minute, on an absolutely BRILLIANT play set up by the Ginger Ninja, Paul Scholes and Wes Brown. It worked perfectly, but of course it did, Ronaldo is only the best player in the world! A few minutes later, there was some miscommunication in the goal box and bad luck for the Red Devils, the Blues equalized in the 44th minute with a goal for Chelsea. I guess Man U was just thinking about sinking their teeth into their halftime oranges, eh?

The second half begins, and it’s all about Chelsea and a lethargic effort of offense by Man U. At this point, Chelsea had about 17 shots on goal totally overpowering Man U’s 7 shots on goal. There were only about 6 Chelsea fans in the pub, and a good many 30 to 40 Man U fans, decked out in the red and white. It kind of reminded me of a Utah-BYU game, actually. The onslaught of goals continued until the 90th minute and stoppage began. There were furious amounts of substitutions as we geared up for the inevitable.
Much to my dismay (and many others at that), UEFA have eliminated the Golden Goal overtime, and have opted for 2 15-minute periods and THEN penalty kicks for their Championship program.

After several minutes of strategies backfiring on both ends, there was a scuffle between both teams. Wes Brown and Carlos Tevez were backed into a corner by several Chelsea players and Didier Drogba, Chelsea’s best player and death striker, made an asinine move and slapped Wes Brown. Sorry mate, you can’t do that. It’s against the rules. Drogba was hit with a Red Card (Vive le Zidane!) and tossed from the pitch to watch his team from the locker room.

2 overtimes are through. Break out some more oranges and Evian!

We go to penalty kicks and Cristiano Ronaldo does something utterly tragic and tried to fake the keeper and Cech guesses right and stops Ronaldo. It’s 4 to 5 and Chelsea’s captain, John Terry just has to make one goal and the title is Chelseas’s…

He slips and falls on his approach and the ball goes wide right off the post!!!

The momentum has switched and Man U breaks in Giggs and Nani’s goal, and Edwin Van Der Sar the mammoth goalkeeper for Manchester United guesses right on Anelka’s poor showing in the bottom left corner and sends it sailing out!

Manchester United wins the UEFA Championship, 6-5p over Chelsea!
Glory, Glory Man United!
The Premier League Champions and UEFA Champions as they seal the Double and become Champions of Europe again!

Tune in next year as I break it down bit by bit and introduce you to the amazing sport of football as it’s meant to be played!
And for your viewing pleasure, I give you the most famous announcer in the world…I just don’t know his name. 
http://youtube.com/watch?v=ghSaZkwetRw

Rhapsody on a theme of my childhood

2008-01-14T19:29:00.000-08:00

Ever since I was a small child, I have always loved the dramatic sounds of classical music. In the center of our living room, we had a dual stereo system. Equipped on the left side was the 8 track player. We had a few 8 track cassettes here and there, some Olivia Newton-John, The Lettermen and others. To the right, we had the old turntable.
I was constantly haunted by the sounds of Carmen, Tchaikovsky’s Nutcracker, The Carpenters, The Beach Boys, and a favorite of mine and my brother’s: The William Tell Overture, which may be more familiarized by its use for scoring The Lone Ranger. In fact, Derek and I would run around the core of the house when it would play. I loved that old record player.
My parents thought it wise to introduce us to the classics of music early on, and I was privileged enough to have Mrs. Ruth Dowding as my 5th grade teacher. She was well versed and taught equally well the Masters of Classical music. Every week we would study a new composer. Bach, Beethoven, Hayden, Mozart, Bizet, Vivaldi and Gershwin to name a few. This early emphasis of music education helped me create a menagerie of dozens of genre that I enjoy to this day.
Erin used a good bit of research and good sense to exchange our Symphony tickets from last November’s “The Rite of Spring” to last week’s “Rhapsody on a Theme of Paganini" by Sergei Rachmaninoff at Abravanel Hall. For those who are not familiar with this exceptional piece, this 24 variation piece isn’t really a rhapsody at all, yet it was named as such for it sounds as if the music is giving the oratory through its harmonic rise and fall. It is also of note that this piece is considered extremely difficult to play on piano and also to accompany with a symphony or orchestra.
I always associate the 18th variation with the movie “Somewhere in Time”, with my childhood hero, Christopher Reeve as the main character who falls in love with a woman in a 1912 photo: the beautiful Jane Seymour.
Reeve played Superman, an ultimate favorite film of mine throughout all my years. Somewhere in Time is an amazing film, and the music is its best feature, besides the lead actress. 
With a full symphony and grand piano before us, I knew this was a special event, none to soon be matched. As I heard the introduction of the 18th variation being played at the symphony this weekend, (about 12 minutes into the rhapsody, I was paralyzed in my seat. The pianist had the sellout crowd totally and voluntarily captivated. We dared not even budge, sniff or make a sound. A particular quiet and hush befell the audience, and everyone just breathed in the entire moment. My eyes filled with tears (I have no problem admitting that art & music often moves me to an ocular salty discharge), and I totally embraced the moment as compelling, perfect, and without a doubt, I accepted this was the most incredible song I had ever heard.
Isn’t it grand to have dreams and moments come true that we have always anticipated we would one day see, hear and experience?
My hat is off to you, Erin. Bless you. Thank you for sharing that unforgettable experience with me and accompanying me in my endeavours and dreams.

I thought I had seen it all...

2007-11-07T10:03:00.000-08:00

until I was at the Coffee stop and overheard a conversation with the traveling customer. I was picking up a daily dose of nectar (Mountain Dew) and ambrosia (blueberry muffin), and a girl driving a Volvo SUV was picking up her Orange Mocha Frappucino (props to Zoolander!), and the coffee girl offered her dog a milk-bone. She said, "No thanks, my dog is a Vegan!"
Absolutely the most absurd thing I have ever heard. Without a doubt, this world is spiraling downwards with no hope for anything good and positive. All of the bystanders just dropped our mouths in disbelief and after she left, we all had a good laugh.

When did we make up our minds that we can turn a carnivore into an herbivore?
Has anyone else seen or witnessed something this silly and overboard?

What I've Been Doing Lately...

2007-10-29T22:22:00.000-07:00

These days it's all about writing.
Writing at home, on a computer that is older than most of my nephews and nieces.
The hope is to truly put enough silly words together to someday create and construct a book. I'm not going to tell you that it will be a monumental piece of work.
All I am telling you now is that it will be worth it, and it will be a reflection of what I have been thinking about lately, what I have put in long hours for about 5 evenings a week, and that it will have all been worth it in the long run.

A few pics from the summer.

Last fishing trip with Schroeder.

Biggest fish of the year so far.

Kunz' first ever Grayling.

The night of the Five Otters on Henry's Fork.

Colorado River Cutthroat

Where I long to be on snowy days...paddling towards the volcano on Kadavu, Fiji.

More to come later.

Spaced out drivers? No survivors

2007-09-20T13:14:00.000-07:00

20th in the Nation? You have GOT to be kidding me? That’s what I read in an article on msn.com a few days ago. It says that Utah has the 20th best driving record out of all 50 states. I just don’t believe it!
Today as I drove from the 9th and 9th area of Salt Lake City, I followed a Ford Taurus wagon with Minnesota license plates. Besides the “BARK” and “COEXIST” bumper stickers, I could tell this driver was a liberal. How do I know? The driver had absolutely NO depth perception, and she passed a cyclist on the left and honest to heaven, she gave the cyclist 15 feet berth so she wouldn’t hit him. I guess she thought it was more important to save the cyclist the burden of her driving, and didn’t think of the oncoming traffic that was headed the other direction. The oncoming car had to STOP to let this lunatic driver pass the cyclist. I mean, COME ON PEOPLE! 15 feet? Our roads are only so wide, she could have given the cyclist 3 feet and he would have been fine.
I turned onto 19th East, and she was still ahead of me. She looked like she was flying a Mooney airplane: She was lined up perfectly…only she was driving, not flying. I couldn’t believe it. I kept honking and pointing my finger towards OUR side of the road, yet cars continued to pull off the side of the road. I got a good look at her, and she wasn’t even talking on a cell phone, nor was she 88 years old.
I have no idea why Utah has such terrible drivers. It couldn’t be that we have more cars in our cities. It couldn’t be that we have more kids on cell phones. So what is the answer? Can anyone tell me? Why are there more and more idiots on the road these days, and why do I feel like I have to be a super-defensive driver when I’m out there? Does anyone have the answer?

Heaven is a Caddisfly

2007-06-24T16:51:00.001-07:00

Messin’ about with George on Friday night, then returning with Schroeder last night to the same streamside locale, gave me a full weekend while certain company was making a familial visit out of state.
My hall pass was given to me freely, and I ran like the wind to Fink’s Creek with a strung-up rod and plenty of caddisflies. Bullwinkle decided to join us both nights and we graciously stepped past, behind and way out of his way. There is so much green vegetation right now it’s tough to pass up this alpine stream in June. The Green Drake hatch is going strong, and there are many Spinners (adult mayflies) out on the water. The fish go NUTS for these insects, and as my fishin’ mates would concur, it makes feeding time a spectacular event to behold.
I fished with my Dad on Tuesday night, and instead of the fish eating, we were literally consumed by billions of small caddisflies. We managed to hook up with a few nice browns and cutthroats, see some deer and have an amazing time on the river together. The fishing was tough, but it was rewarding for me to spend some time with Dad.
George is a good stick, indeed. Growing up in Victoria, George learned to fly fish about ten years ago. Tasmania is where he longs to fish the most, though he has spent time in his college years in Nottingham, England and Melbourne, Australia, where he currently lives. If you ever have the opportunity to spend time with an Aussie, I highly recommend it. The accent is wacky, but completely fascinating, and you will find most Aussies (New South Wales’ residents commonly excluded) are pretty laid back and have pleasant personalities.
The hatch that evening was quite heavy. There was a massive spinner fall of drakes, mixed in with a few small caddis. The competition was grueling: Who of us would catch the smallest trout? Loser buys dinner afterwards. “King’s to you George”, who landed what we estimated as a 3 inch cutthroat, yet brilliant with cantaloupe orange coloration and light cutt markings under his bill. We hit Desert Edge Pub & Brewery afterwards and threw down Turkey sandwiches, but he demanded he foot the bill. George is a class act.

This could be the best picture I have ever taken, and quite on accident. The brookie was wriggling about when I was trying to take a still pic, but his action and his swinging caudal tail really tell its own story: “Get this fly OUTTA my mouth!” Notice the red spots, surrounded by blue halos. This species is TRULY remarkable!

This is the prettiest fish I have caught in a week. I love the blue spot just northeast of his mouth, on the gill plate.

Fishing with Schroeder is always a fun time. He was stoked when he learned he would be fishing a new spot last night. I guaranteed him we would only catch brookies, cutts and cuttbows. You should see how animated his face is when he catches fish. And it’s refreshing to know that someone is perpetually jonesin’ all the time about fly fishing as much as I am...in fact, he may be even more! We fished Fink’s all night, and skipped my all-time favorite section when the sun was dropping and Bullwinkle came out to greet us. The moon was at half last night as the heavenly bodies of Jupiter, Venus, Saturn and the massive Class M Red Supergiant Antares guided us back to our car after wetting the line and sharing time with our salmonid and char brothers and sisters.
Spending the night during Caddis hatches are my favorite of all that fly fishing has to offer.

The Hatch Revisited

2007-06-13T20:52:00.001-07:00

At the shop, we have a blog that we are supposed to occasionally write in, and therefore, spill all of our secrets about our days of fishing.
I have a blast while reading through my fellow employees tackling big fish, but I never want to divulge of my secret spots.
As a local flyfisherman, I have been blessed with many private water fishing opportunities. I constantly fish the Upper Provo, on the Diamond Bar Ranch, as my friend Phil has allowed me to be on his property for the last 5 years. I have pulled out 3 fish over 22 inches, all brown trout. Thanks Phil!
I have access to the Wright ranch on Tabiona, which I consider the “Montana of my youth” as has been stated by Norman McLean. In fact, I fished it today in the thickest Green Drake and Golden Stonefly hatch of my life.
I fished it with a high school buddy, Dave K. As we reminisced about “cruisin” in either the Chevette (don’t be jealous!) or the Scirocco, pickin up on ladies on State Street, playin hoops on Donner Hill, listening to Milli Vanilli and Led Zeppelin (I’m quite the contrastical individual when it comes to musical taste) and our favorite girls at that time, we politely rope-a-doped on brown and cutthroat trout, which happened to be gorging themselves on every fly thrown their way.
We fished Impearsonators, Half-down Goldens, Micro Mayfly emergers, and Platte River Spiders. We caught plenty of fish, and more than I can count on my fingers and toes…but really, I just wanted one.

This is a Green Drake adult. They are so beautiful. Yes, bugs need love too!

Bunyan Bug, Stonefly #2 ;)

Happy Fishing to All and to all a Big Cutt!

Memoirs of the Savanna

2007-06-04T20:07:00.000-07:00

My brother sent me amazing footage of a herd of Cape Buffalo, three Nile Crocodiles, and a pride of lions. After watching endless footage of animals attacking and hunting their prey, I am oft reminded of an experience in the Maasai Mara a few years ago. I bring this up only because it was a good reminder of how sheltered some people really are…
It was our second day on the Maasai Mara, Kenyan’s Nature Preserve that magically becomes the Serengeti once you cross the Tanazanian border, and we were watching hippos and large Nile crocs on the Mara River. A small Nile Monitor was making its way towards the bottom of the gulch, and a 6 foot immature croc was inching towards this large lizard in stealthy fashion. Within about 3 feet from the water’s edge, the crocodile is poised to make its move, where it will potentially snatch the lizard off the rock and have himself a fine dinner.
Enter “Lisa Zoobie” (the names have been changed to protect the innocent, stupid and otherwise entirely naïve), a BYU co-ed, who naturally loves watching movies like “What is Real?” “Our Heavenly Father’s Plan”, and “The Prodigal Son”, while sipping her Caffeine free Diet Coke and playing Pictionary while living at Helaman Halls or Deseret Towers on campus. No doubt, she has eaten countless amounts of steak, chicken and fish over the years, but she is yet to see a real life animal attack its prey in the name of starvation and hunger. Lisa perceives the lizard will be toast momentarily, so she throws a rock at the lizard to scare it away. No meal for the crocodile, no video opportunity for the rest of us. It was almost the last mistake Lisa would ever make in this lifetime…
Out of the bushes springs a Kenyan military officer, fully equipped with an automatic machine gun, and begins to rebuke the absolute hell out of Lisa. Rightfully so. I was secretly cheering him on, as he yelled at her and told her that while she was off painting her nails in her so-called protected life, that animals have been hunting each other for thousands of years and she had absolutely NO right to change the Circle of Life. I think she did it just to protect her virgin eyes from seeing one animal eat another. Poor Lisa. She heard it from all of the rest of us, after GI Joe went back to his job of protecting the animals of the sanctuary. It’s good to know an act like that warrants a shot to the head with a bullet the size of my middle finger. If only you could have heard her for the rest of the day, talking about how dangerous the soldier was, and if she had a right to call her lawyer and press charges for defamation of her character…we all wanted to strangle her. In all fairness, the soldier was entirely within his job description to do as he pleased. In Kenya, they shoot first, THEN ask questions. In Kenya, they don’t have much more than their wildlife viewing opportunities and their Big Game hunts to bring in any kind of income. The land is dry, but the wildlife is bounteous. In my time in East Africa, I have been pleased to see three lionesses bring down a Cape Buffalo (while chillin in a Matatu, in a rainstorm, listening to Enya); a cheetah running full speed and overtaking a Grant’s or Thomson’s Gazelle; and a leopard dining on an Impala, 20 feet up in a Sausage tree. Oh yeah, I almost peed on a Gabon Viper, not 20 yards from the Mara River.
I don’t know what ever happened to Lisa Zoobie, but I remember she got numerous wake-up calls into the steaming manure pit that is called life for most people in Kenya. Her perspectives of how life is tough to live when you scrap for food on a daily basis reminds me of my first visit to Kenya, and helped me realize that my everyday life is a blessing from on High. We should all remember the privileges we have to seek out scholastic advancements, pursue financial opportunities and do our best to make life joyful. But we should also remember that approximately 5/6 of the world has it tougher than us, and though all things are relative, we need not complain about our dire living situations.
You should have seen the dilation of Lisa’s eyes when that soldier bolted from the bushes straight at her…priceless.

"Who planted all these damn Russian Olives?"

2007-05-31T22:23:00.000-07:00

The wind started promptly after I tied on my Letort #14, and I headed into the short microbursts that Ol’ Mama Nature occasionally gives us. The right bank, a mere 80 feet from where I stood, was my fly’s intended destination. I gave the hopper a light dusting of the fanny, and placed my left foot about half a meter ahead of my right foot, and commenced with the double-haul. Fishing a Boron IIx in the wind is truly excellent, especially with a 5-weight, even though it’s only an 8’6 rod. This green stick has just enough power to turn over large flies, even in the wind.

Within three false casts (I’m a minimalist when it comes to the threat of shoulder muscle fatigue) I had enough line and nine feet of leader to lay down Mr. Letort and try and tempt a fish to rise…

It has been just over a year from this time that I tied on what I classify to be the second most effective Caddis pattern on earth…the Palomino Caddis, tied by my friend, Cheech. With just enough material on the skybound side of the hook, this fine little artifical specimen has tricked many a wary trout in the last 365 days. It boasts a rusty cinnamon hue and a small tuft of feather that sits perfectly in the surface of the water and tempts even the cleverest brown trout. Yes, cleverest is indeed a word, for you ever-editing English nerds!

No fish this time around, leastways on this stretch of river. The Lower Ranch can be tricky, and can throw even a master angler off. And I do not consider myself a master, nor will I ever refer to myself in that light. There are far too many who have gone before, only to be outwitted by those pea-brained salmonids.
Save only the brutish Leven brown that Bobby scared up from the depths of the Mother Hole, and the ever sly trout that hit my Hemingway after a precise downstream cast just above the Forbidden Pool, our luck had run dry from the day. However, I do not remember a day that could compare in the sun’s rays, the balmy 68 degrees at 7300 ft, or the green foliage of budding Aspens and towering Ponderosas than that of yesterday, chasing trout on the South Slope.

Colorado River Cutthroat, Eastern Brookies and Browns “how do you know they’re German browns? Do they have little red swastikas?” (a joke I coined when I was 22 years old, fishin on the Logan with Dave) made the potential dinner menu, but as instructed by those wiser than us, we released all our fish, to live on and fight another day.

Perhaps I will give the Russian Olive Run another shot in a few weeks, when the stones and drakes come out to play. Until then, I can only visualize large trout bellies, bluebird skies, and enough Mountain Dew to make even a camel think twice about his next pit stop. My heart belongs to the slopes of the High Uintas, and perhaps, one day when I’m lucky, it will belong to someone very special.

Good Ol' Roy

2007-05-27T21:21:00.000-07:00

One of my favorite lines from the cinematic world comes to full fruition when Roy Hobbs relaxes in a thoughtful pondering stare and calmly says, “I Love baseball.” The Natural is an all-time classic, and I think about the way Redford exclaims the joy of his life so solemnly.

This is the way I feel about flyfishing. I don’t believe I could ever leave the mountains, as I have stated before. Mountain streams, great rivers and just the presence of water send chills down my back. I still cannot believe my good fortune in landing a job at a fly shop. In just a short month, I have learned about how good rods are made, how a drag works on a reel, more knots than I care to mention, entomology, and the realization that there are others just like me who love fly fishing more than life itself!

I feel so free in knowing that I LOVE getting up every morning to go to work and feeling so passionate about my surroundings, confidence in my ability to communicate with customers, relive fishing experiences with others, hearing wild stories of both maddening frustration coupled with extreme joy, and working in a calm atmosphere. Here’s the great thing: It does NOT feel like work.

The habits I have created at work have crossed over into my living situation as well. I am constantly cleaning my bathroom, vacuuming my floor about twice a week, folding clothes perfectly, and tying flies for about two hours every night.

I also treasure my time to fish, and love having any opportunity I can get to cast new rods, test out new reels, and continue to educate myself about running a successful fly fishing business.

The Green Drakes will be poppin soon, as will the Golden Stoneflies. I will write again when these gorgeous mayflies make their presence known. Until then, Fish On!

Stimis & Hoppers & Hizzy Spizzies, O My!

2007-05-03T21:56:00.000-07:00

Paul: Norm, what do you want to be when you grow up?
Norm: A minister, I guess. Or a professional boxer.

Paul: You think you could beat Jack Johnson?
I think you could.
I'd lay a bet on it.

Norm: What are you gonna be?
Paul: A professional fly-fisherman.

Norm: There's no such thing.

Paul: There isn't? I guess a boxer.

Norm: Not a minister?
Paul: Heh!

Thus is my new reality. While I wait for all to be good in the realm of massage therapy, I am filling my daytime hours with a job I can’t believe they pay me for down at Western Rivers Flyfisher.

Fly fishing has always been a heartfelt love, passion, obsession, or whatever you want to call it. I have thought about working down at the Shop for a long time, and just now, the timing seems absolutely perfect, and I have been given a full-time job in which I can learn about the industry, improve my skills as a fisherman, and also work as hard as I can to establish a good reputation for Western.
It’s pretty exciting that I am able to immerse myself in countless products of clothing, rods, reels, waders, fly tying material, and get to know so many wonderful people in the area who love to fly fish almost as much as me!
I basically have one day during the week that I get out and fish, and it is JUST what I need after talking all day to other people who get to fish. Yes, I realize I was in their shoes just two weeks ago, but I love the education I am getting from working in the shop and learning all about our products and

I wanna go fast...

2007-04-07T09:59:00.000-07:00

There is just something about a fast car that is amazing to me.
Just yesterday as T-roy and I were driving home from the ranch, we saw the Aston Martin Vanquish, the dynasty coupe from James Bond lore. This car was SO beautiful, and when I tried to get a close up picture with my camera phone, the driver sped off and left me in the dust. Ironic? I was already doing 80 mph just to catch up to him. And VROOOM! Off in a hurry he went. I never did get my photo. 

Someone sent me an article about the fastest car in the world. Right now, the fastest car in the world is called a 2007 Bugatti Veyron, and it sports 1001 hp, and can go 407 km/h, or 253 mph. That’s faster than most Cessna one prop airplane can fly. And it’s certainly faster than any other car. Daytona, Formula 1, even my old Scirocco.

Here is the video in its entirety. They have set it up to the cinematic score of Star Wars I: The Phantom Menace. It is hard to get an idea of how fast this car is going…until you can see the trees in the background vanishing into nothingness.

http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x157l2_bugatti-veyron-at-top-speed

It may take a while for it to load, but I believe it is certainly worth your wait. Just listen to a lot of the specs on the car, such as: This car has 10 radiators, meanwhile most cars only have ONE. Have fun.

The Dream Trip

2007-03-27T11:01:00.000-07:00

Commencing on June 2nd, 2007, three characters will be leaving the shores of the Great Salt Lake and heading east, towards the Rocky Mountains, the backbone of the continent.
I have been sworn to secrecy, but I can assure you that we will be fishing for 5 days in Utah and 10 days in Colorado, and more specifically for the legendary Salmonfly hatch in the Black Canyon of the Gunnison River. We will be taking our digital camcorder, and will be recording most of the days’ events. The locations will be changed and run through a National Security Firewall so that we may protect the innocent trout we plan on catching, and so others will not ditch their full-time jobs and try to entice large cruising trout to their silly dry flies. Our company of three is just the right amount for the three tasks while on the river:
1) The cameraman
2) The fish spotter
3) The angler
Traveling with me: Mucha and Schroeder, though nicknames will be earned and assigned prior to the beginning of the exodus.
Schroeder is a pilot by day, Macbook junkie by night, wannabe skater 24/7 and this guy throws a mean Andy Kim combination as he learned the art of flyfishing while in flight school in Farmington, New Mexico. It makes sense that he would spend all of his extracurricular time on the San Juan, targeting rod-breaking rainbows and brutish brown trout. Schroeder also has a rare taste for the “Guadalagucho”, the Lucha Libre wrestling style of Mexican tradition. Rumor has it he can put away 3 breakfast burritos from Molcasalsa in ONE sitting!
Mucha works somewhere in the realm of banking for Wells Fargo, but we know the internal weekend warrior is a South Slope Enthusiast who knows how to catch those big butterscotch browns better than anyone. Taught in the way of his grandfather, his knowledge of secret trout streams exceeds his age and experience. Standing only 5’8 (on a good day) with Afro intact, he sports an unconventional yet graceful casting style and his accuracy is unmatched. Mucha is also a HUGE Grateful Dead fan and will no doubt have a great amount of influence in selecting music for the video.
The Angling Exploration Group have already shown us the way on how to make a documentary, via the “Trout Bum Diaries” and we tip their hats to them when we say that we hope our film doesn’t suck TOO much, and that our 15 day adventure will be an homage to the other flyfishing filmmaking enthusiasts. If we find any success beyond our own financial exteriors, we make take it one step further and create a production company. I have to admit, I never thought I would be making a DVD with an adventure, but thanks to my old roomies, the founders of www.canyonboys.com I have been shown the way to my own creative endeavors.
Stay tuned for more updates into the June Flyfishing marathon!

9th South Sunsets

2007-03-14T19:06:00.000-07:00

I can’t be happier with the decision to accelerate the dates three weeks early for Daylight Savings. Coupled with the mahvelous weather we have had lately, it’s good to see people out and about in nature’s environs and soaking up the sun.
One of the events of spring and summer I look forward to the most is watching the sun’s path take a northern route. For most of the winter, the Oquirrh Mountains on the west side of the Salt Lake Valley hide the sun early, and the end of the day as far as daylight goes is around 5 pm. Talk about depressing! But now, the date being March 14, the sun is just climbing over the northern end of the Oquirrhs and just shaving the smokestack just south of I-80.
The sky tonight looked as if it were on fire. I was driving up 9th South, and noticed in my rear view mirror that the collision of the sun’s rays and the clouds were painting a perfect Monet, with brilliant hues and shades of pink, orange, purple and fuchsia. In all reality, it was more of a 1050 South sunset, but the colors were almost perfect tonight, so I’m giving it an Honorable Mention. 9th South sunsets have always given me hope and wild anticipation for the upcoming spring season.
In about a week, the sun will be setting perfectly in alignment with 9th South. If you live in SLC, try and find yourself up by the East High baseball field or the old reliable, Donner Trail Park just above the zoo as the evening daylight begins to falter. Pray for cloud cover. The best sunsets involve cumulus and cirrus cloud formations.
Now, the real treat for all you sunset chasers is to climb to the “Living Room” up on Red Butte. It takes a good 45 minutes to get up there, but that is one sunset you will never forget. Just make sure to take flashlights for the way out. A friend of mine and I came down from that hike by ourselves one night, and she swore we were being stalked by a cougar. So go up in a group. The only other place I would suggest a better view is up near Mt Francis, just east of Farmington. My cousin Jeremy took me up there and it dang near took us 3 hours to get to the top. We camped in a saddle, and I will never forget the view. I believe Francis is around 10,000 feet, and we could see over Antelope Island on the Great Salt Lake and out to the Pilot Peak mountain range, just north of Wendover, NV. The sunset that night went on forever. And it was also the first time I ate Pork and Beans out of a can over the fire. Ahh, the memories from yesteryear brim with nostalgia.
So get off your duff in the evenings this spring and enjoy the sunsets as we count down into summer.

Scrubs

2007-02-20T21:38:00.000-08:00

Not since the late 80’s and early 90’s have I enjoyed a sitcom so much. The last classic was the ever-hilarious “Wings”. I remember that D and I watched that show ALL THE TIME! I saw each episode about 4 or 5 times, and still to this day, if I can find an old VHS with “Wings” on it, I will watch and just laugh my head off.
Fast forward to now, February of 2007. I watch three other shows on television regularly. #1=Smallville. I’ve been at it for 6 seasons, so why would I stop now? Besides, it’s the mythology of SUPERMAN. And it’s a family affair. #2= HEROES. What a cool show! It’s kind of DNA mutation idea that parallels the X-Men series, but these writers are so darn creative I completely envy their storyboards and creative consultant jobs. I love it, it’s very creative and I find that I am so intrigued about how the story will unfold that it soon climbed past #3= LOST. I really think JJ Abrams needs to put down the crack pipe and decide what he wants to do with LOST. If it ends like ALIAS did, I will be sorely disappointed. I need some continuity here, Mr. Abrams. I think we ALL do.
Well, among these serious plots and 466 other channels boasting reality television, I find I need some comedy to give me a good laugh here and there. Well, I have found the pot o’ gold I have been searching for since the early 90’s once again.

Yes ladies and gentlemen, SCRUBS is one half hour of pure comedic delight. I can’t remember the last time I laughed so hard every time I watched a show. “Will and Grace” was pretty funny too, but SCRUBS takes the cake. Just thought I would give public homage to the humorous writing on television right now. I would love to be on the set for an episode, you can just tell they are having a blast. I’m just excited that there is always something to watch nowadays and when I’m in the mood for a good laugh.

Superbirds: Raptors of the Sky

2007-02-19T13:24:00.000-08:00

While I was finishing my mission out in Colorado, I was assigned to the great metropolitan area of Rifle, Colorado for my last 4 months. The Rifle area consisted of a few towns: Silt, Antlers, Canyon Creek, Parachute, Buford, Garfield, New Castle and Grand Valley. I know what y’all are thinkin, it must be a HUGE city! ;)
So one week I was out with my comp, we traveled to Glenwood, where a favorite Elder of mine, Matt Sherrill transferred over from Boulder to Glenwood Springs, our neighboring area and the only other missionaries in our District. Sherrill and I were in Boulder with separate comps but the missionaries are the tightest in Boulder, since it’s such a weird and wild place, plus they lived two blocks away. So we made it a point to have a companion switch at least once or twice a week with these clowns. P-days were the best time to do these. I’d leave Charlie with another Elder and Sherrill and I would go wildlife watching in the mountains (bighorn sheep below Buford), (elk in the Harvey Gap range) and of course, huge spawning brown trout on the Colorado, Roaring Fork and Frying Pan rivers.
Just a quick side note: Sherrill even took me to the grave of Doc Holliday, of Tombstone gunwars and Wyatt Earp fame. The gravestone has his name on it, and always has a bottle of half empty Jack Daniels Tennessee Whiskey with a nipple on it. Each visitor inverts the bottle and squeezes a drop or two into the ground, so that Doc’s appetite for liquor never drowns out. Weird ritual, but everyone does it.
Well on one of these occasions, Sherrill started callin’ me “Eagle Eye”, because I’ve been blessed with good eyesight, and can usually spot an animal a long way off. This heightened sense helped me to spot a cheetah chase a gazelle in Africa. It helped me mark two great white sharks tailing a baby Humpback in Australia, and also to see sharks feeding on a dead turtle on Fraser Island, Queensland.

I told you THAT story to tell you THIS story, so this has a point, most indeedy. Last night, I was flipping through channels looking for something entertaining to watch. Sunday night in the fall always has a football game or something, but it’s the middle of winter now. I stopped on Channel 7, the local channel for Public Broadcasting System. Ever since I was a kid, “Nature” has been on for my viewing pleasure. Last night’s episode was about Raptors. No, not those monstrous devil lizards from Jurassic Park. More like raptors of the sky, meaning birds of prey. It was a well written program, and presented the information in a style that was familiar to me. The story began with the Legend of Icarus, and his desire to fly like a bird. It moved onto how eagles, vultures, hawks and owls fly, hover, manipulate and exploit the wind to increase their speed and energy while in flight. These birds caught on film, coupled with special effects from computers, instruct viewers on how these birds are able to pull off amazing feats of high-speed chases, detection through the elements, and how incredible their senses are.
I once listened to a hollow-minded and less educated teacher in junior high school tell me that animals do not see in color. I asked, “What about birds?” He told me that birds only have built-in telephoto lenses in their eyes, but couldn’t see in color. I knew, KNEW he was wrong. I was able to show him the facts on raptors with a few books from the school’s media library. I really hope he was watching last night’s program, too.

The American Kestrel sees ultraviolet light, and detects rodents through seeing their urine patches. Apparently, rodent urine gives off tremendous UV lights, and this makes it easy for raptors to find these creatures to prey on. The kestrel sees 350 more colors than the human eye can. The kestrel also has an amazing ability to hover in the air, resting comfortably on a current of hot air, also called a thermal. The uncanny trick, is that while his body is trying to stay aloft in the same place, his vision is perfect and unblurred. I have seen this MANY a time, and would suggest to you fine people to take a look and keep your eyes peeled to the sky for these birds, the smallest of the birds of prey.

This next bird is my favorite of all the owls: the Great Grey Owl.
Al and I were fishing the Lower section of the Tabiona ranch when we spotted two of these large strigidae. They were using a cavity of a tree trunk to house their nest. We spotted two babies, and two adults. Interestingly enough, these birds do NOT migrate, so if you like spotting owls, head to wooded areas where you can patiently wait and listen. These birds have extremely sensitive hearing and eyesight. They are also very quiet fliers.

The bateleur isn’t the most amazing eagle in the world, but the reason I am showcasing this bird is because of how beautiful it is to spot one in the wild. Their profile against a blue sky in the savanna of Kenya is truly an amazing sight! These small eagles, along with Marabou Storks, and mwewes (small African kites) frequent Nairobi, always looking for lizards, snakes and rodents. They keep things interesting in the city and slums.

The Lappet-faced vulture is a giant among other vultures. The Lappet’s size and wingspan makes other raptors look like sparrows. This vulture is found only in Africa. Hollywood has always made idiots of themselves when using vultures in film. They don’t use Turkey or Black vultures, but Hooded or Lappet-faced vultures. In fact, the vultures you see laughing on Splash Mountain as Disney World are carbon copies of the largest African vulture. The first picture is of a Lappet-faced. Beautiful birds in flight, ugly as Yoda up close. I have an amazing picture of a Lappet landing in a high tree, just above the Mara River in Western Kenya. 200 feet below it was a 14 foot Nile crocodile, and about 5 hippos.

This is an African vulture. I think these bad boys are the coolest looking birds in the world. They just have a mean looking face!
And when it comes to vultures, Africa wins. North America has the ugliest raptor in the world, the turkey vulture. When you see a large bird circling in the wind on a hot day, chances are that you will be seeing a turkey vulture. They usually hang out in groups as well, especially when there is a carcass around. Here is the ugly Turkey Vulture. No, I do not think they have a face a mother could love.

The fastest animal in the whole wide world, easily surpassing the sail fish and cheetah, is the Peregrine Falcon. My father and his twin brother found a P falcon when they were young. They found it in Fairmont Park, in SLC. They named it Odin, of Norse mythology. They kept it in the white coop in Grandpa Wright’s backyard, I think. How lucky my dad was to find such a beautiful creature.
The Peregrine can dive up to speeds past 200 mph in pursuit of game birds such as sage grouse, ducks, doves and whatever else it wants to chase. John and I saw a peregrine chasing a Mourning dove in City Creek canyon, not 20 feet between us in the river corridor. I’ve seen the peregrines downtown in SLC chasing the pigeons all over the place. Side note: the peregrines have nests on the buildings in Temple Square, and all the pigeons live on the Cathedral of the Madeline. That’s a metaphor for the Mormon falcons being the top dogs and regulators of SLC over the Catholic pigeons. Ha ha ha. Nature is funny, isn’t it? ;)
If you are ever in downtown SLC and have some time to kill, look up in the sky and try and pick out one of these small falcons. They are amazing fliers and they just sizzle through the sky as they drop, maneuver and twist through the different buildings in search of slower birds.

Birds of prey are protected in the United States. Please don’t kill them. If you get caught, you will spend 5-20 years in Federal Prison for doing so. Take advantage of a drive down a dusty road and look for birds on fenceposts, telephone poles, tree branches, telephone lines and other high structures. I keep a pair of binoculars with me at all times in the car when I am in rural, desert or mountain areas. I am humbled to have earned the nickname "Eagle Eyes" from my friend. I love driving through certain parts of the country, specifically past Strawberry Reservoir to watch Bald Eagles and Ospreys pick off trout in the water. I love the Golden Eagles just above the U of U on the East bench of SLC. Star Valley, Wyoming has more raptors than any other area I have been to in the West. There are Golden eagles, hawks, owls and falcons all over the place in Wyoming. I especially love the raptors of Africa too. The bateleur, African Fish Eagle and Tawny Eagle. Someday, I wish to see the great Harpy Eagle as well. The Steller's sea-eagle is what the Seattle Seahawks are named after, and they are so cool looking. I will never stop looking for these birds. They are the greatest of all animals I believe.
We have a great opportunity to learn from these birds as we watch their majestic bodies and wings fly over the Earth, and create jealousy in our minds and souls as we too wish what Icarus wanted the most in life: to fly.

Elephants v. Donkeys

2007-02-14T12:09:00.000-08:00

Random thought: Why did the Democrats pick a DONKEY to represent them? I guess the creative minds weren't coming together on that idea...

With the way everything in politics is developing lately, I should say it will be a VERY interesting campaign.
I truly hope more people show up at the polls. It’s very frustrating that we live in a country where people are allowed to vote for their leaders and our overall percentage of voters is less than half of those who CAN vote.

Most interesting to me will be the banter between McCain and Romney. Not 24 hours after Romney announced his candidacy did McCain jump all over him for switching on issues. That’s interesting. John McCain said that. And he’s NEVER switched issues. Or would that be switching political parties?

Everyone put on your raincoats and fire up the popcorn. I’m sure we are in for a treat with all the mudslinging that will happen between now and Nov of 2008.

The moment I know you have all waited for...

2007-02-05T22:35:00.000-08:00

Every year, I make a list of the Top 5-10 songs that have contributed to my life in a great and positive way. These songs have the ability to inspire me, push me or just take me to an alternative universe for five minutes.

The Top 10 for 2006 are:

1) It’s a TIE! Two songs have lifted me the most: Adagio For Strings; Love Comes Again by DJ Tiesto
Seriously, y’all, this DJ from Holland is so amazing, he constantly sells out concerts to crowds of 50-200,000 people. I would like to hear him live someday. I know, it’s Psychedelic Trance, and if you don’t get it, then you just don’t get it! Americans usually don’t jive with trance or techno, it’s TOO simple for them. Not me, I LOVE it! In my humble opinion, it’s the most amazing music made. Tiesto is great at creating a fusion with classical music and amazing percolating drums and electronic sounds.

2) Don’t Stop by ATB
No song is simpler than about ATB’s second all-time hit. It spans 5 different chords throughout this song, but it’s just so HAPPY. What you have to understand is that I used to drive to the desert/Zion/Moab with my friend Mark, and we would just put this stuff on and listen intently what the music and rhythm was trying to tell us. It’s insanely GREAT music to drive to. A good bass system is an absolute essential when listening to trance.

3) Welcome to the Black Parade by My Chemical Romance
These guys remind me of Queen. The lead singer has a great range, and he also reminds me of the lead singer of Blink 182, but less of a whiner.
Any time a song can change the overall direction and begin anew in the middle of the song, you know the composer has OBVIOUSLY studied the sounds of Rush and Chicago. I look forward to more of MCR in the future.

4) Nothing But You by Hemstock and Jennings; Paul Van Dyk
Back when I was at SLCC, I would bolt to the library between classes and watch Yahoo’s videos that they had on their launch player. The video is pretty silly, but this song just RADIATES energy and happiness. There are no words in this song, but a female’s voice reverberates through the whole song and she is just singing LA-LA-LA style. It’s gorgeous! Apparently she is singing in some Scandinavian language, but not unlike Lisa Gerrard, it doesn’t matter WHAT she is singing about, it’s the beauty of the voice in the song.

Paul Van Dyk

5) I Love You by Sarah McLachlan
I have owned the “Surfacing” CD by SM for quite a while, but I guess I was just touched by Track #2 on this CD. It’s a touching song. She has a soothing sound, so she’s tough to pass up.

6) Hysteria by Muse
D-Rock introduced me to this cool band as we took a Sunday drive in the Jeep and we went over to Porterville and Big Mountain. Hysteria is an adrenaline rush of a song. When it comes to a good bass guitar, only John Paul Jones of Led Zeppelin takes the cake. However, Muse’ bass guitarist has some AWESOME riffs throughout the whole “Absolution” album. These guys have a great sound, and it makes me want more.

7) Attention Deficit Disorder by DJ DSD
This is about the silliest song ever created. I picked it up from a friend who just spent the last few years in Japan. He bought the CD at a Trance party in Tokyo, and I cannot find the author since I cannot speak Japanese. It’s totally A.D.D., but it sports a tantalizing beat that I can’t resist bouncing to.

8) Would You Go With Me by Josh Turner
I would never downplay the talent of Pete Townsend (The Who), the genius orgasmic vocal talent of Robert Plant (Led Zeppelin), or the shrieking cries of Geddy Lee (Rush), but sometimes all I need is a song that boasts a baritone or bass voice. Josh Turner (as D-Rock has blogged about before) has an awesome voice, and is incredibly deep. I read that he can hit 5 notes below me as clear as a bell. That is DEEP! I’m not generally a country fan, but every once in a while, I’m swept off my feet by a great song. I know the ladies love this guy, and his music is actually pretty decent.

9) The 1812 Overture (assisted with the explosions in V for Vendetta) This movie would NOT have been the same without the 1812 Overture by our man Pytor Tschaikovksy. This is definitely an amazing movie, and I was officially moved to tears at the end when the coordinated efforts of this song is fused into the…well, you will just have to see it for yourself!

10) Mars and Venus by the Brunettes
Has anyone else picked up this CD? I received a mix CD from my friend Jamie Sanders, and among other great lesser known bands such as the Magnetic Fields, Brendan Benson, Old and the Way, there lies a song by the Brunettes. I don’t know much about this guy/girl duo, but they have some FUN songs. It’s almost a throwback to the 50’s style with their songs, but they are creative and catchy.

A great place to listen to new songs and songs like this is either at iTunes,
www.pandora.com, or use the Guide in your Windows Media Player.

Tune in next year for the Top 10. Who knows where our different strains of musical taste will lead all of us? That is one adventure I am always willing to go on…you just never know.

Good day/Sad day

2007-02-04T19:52:00.001-08:00

And now I digress…

The Australian Open was the most exciting thing I’ve watched besides football this year. And yes, Roger Federer is a demi-god.
March Madness is okay.
NBA Finals? Not even worth mentioning.
I’m sad to see football ‘exit stage left’ for a season or two. 

Great year of football this year. Good to see Manning become an Elway, and not a Marino. Props to the Colts.

Can’t wait for August and pre-season football once again.
I love football!

Ouch! That hurts!

2007-02-01T23:09:00.000-08:00

So I thought I would just tell the story once today at school, so I moseyed into class, and told everyone within earshot in Anatomical Nomenclature what had happened. My Physiology Instructor got a big kick out of it as well when I informed the curious students that, “I went into plantar flexion to retrieve the ball, and went I came down from the jump, I inverted my right foot, and rolled the lateral malleolus. I also fear that I have a partial tear in my fibular collateral ligament (or LCL for the layperson) of my right foot. I asked of my fellow players that one would help fetch some ice and two others assist me to the bench so I could R.I.C.E. RICE= Rest Ice Compress Elevate.”

The interesting thing about injury is all that body is immediately directed into the area of injury and the WBC’s (white blood cells) instantly start to repair the injury. Edema (swelling) follows, and the ice decreases the swelling. Some swelling is good, for it means that the blood is doing its job to repair and rest the area. It also helps to try and immobilize the injured area. Immobilization helps the ligaments and tendons in the area also heal and return to their normal tensile strength, which is what helps us keep our balance and keeps the bones stay in distant relationships with each other. Compression comes in the way of an ACE bandage, and though it hurts, it helps SOOOO much! Anyway, back to the story!

So I jumped in the car, and tenderly eased the Suburban home, (it still takes quite a bit of plantar flexion to press a Chevy’s gas pedal to the floor), hopped inside the house, tried a little Hydrotherapy in the way of vasodilation (applying short bursts of warmth) and vasoconstriction. Let me tell you now that it is much easier to apply a bag of ice to an injury than to submerge your entire foot into a tub of ice. 90 seconds was my record yesterday, and I have NO plans for trying to beat that record in the future.
Still, the ice has brought the swelling down hardcore.
In just a few short weeks, I hope to be back on the volleyball court, in the gym strengthening my Peroneus longus and tibialis posterior muscles.

Swimming Lessons

2007-01-26T16:17:00.000-08:00

I had an educational experience in the pool at the gym the other night.
At a distant location of Gold’s Gym, I went through my normal workout and when I finished, I had a choice: elliptical or pool? I looked over at the cardio side of the gym and there were scores of sweating bodies that just looked like they had received the groovy news they were being audited by the IRS. I looked over at the pool, and there was not a soul to be found.
So in five minutes, I walked into the steam room for a little vasodilation (hot/cold treatment) and when I walked out, there were two other people swimming. Luckily, there are three lanes: Fast, Medium and Slow. They had been very gracious to let me have the “slow” lane so I could anonymously suck rocks while making lengths and laps.
I took 2 laps (4 lengths) in about 5 minutes with the least stressful technique of breaststroke, and thought I would spice things up a bit and perform my own medley with some freestyle. After one lap of an all-out effort, I immediately became exhausted and my heart was pounding about 1,000 mph. I have done my research, and swimming burns about 5 times more calories than running on a treadmill in an average 3o minutes to an hour. Swimming for an hour? I can’t imagine RUNNING for that long!
As I was about to take off for my sixth length, my leg was grabbed underwater, and I shot up and looked around. The girl next to me smiled and said, “Is that your inhaler?” I replied with an affirmation, and she asked very nicely if she could have a puff. She took two, actually. I asked her how many laps she had swam, and she said 10 laps. So mystery girl and her boyfriend were gracious enough to give me some serious pointers on how to improve my time and exercise while in the pool. Aquawoman had blown away my time and I asked how many laps she planned on swimming. “5,000 yards!” Okeysillydillydokey-o! Just to give you an idea of how far 5,000 yards really is, one length of the pool is 25 yards. That’s 100 laps. I guess it takes her 90 minutes to complete that. And she does this 3 times a week!
When else would I have an opportunity to receive some serious instruction from an asthmatic about increasing lungpower? I humbled myself and asked what she does to help her meet that goal. I guess I opened Pandora’s Box with this one. In about five minutes, she gave me some serious constructive criticism in my technique, my breathing, and she broke it down so I could understand it so well. She followed that up by saying that I potentially have a swimmer’s body, and that I move very well in the water for not having disciplined lessons in the last 20 years.
What I need to change: I need to expel about 80% of my air before I take another breath. I also need to rotate my hips so that I glide on top of the water. At an instant I realized how effortless it is for me to kick my legs in the process when I move my deep hip rotators (I get to be an Anatomy snob here, ha!) And she also told me to slooooooooow down and focus on the breathing aspect, and the endurance aspect and gave me a good game plan for every time I get in the pool. Basically, I should try and swim 4 laps in freestyle, then follow that up with 1 lap of breaststroke, then rest about 90 seconds. Take a puff, go another 4 freestyle then 1 in b-stroke. She has done this for the past 6 months, and her lungpower has increased tenfold.

I went back today and jumped in the pool and was able to do 25 laps. This isn’t bad, considering I had just completed Day 1 of my FC routine. And now, yes, I’m quite destroyed. But I’m so happy to be seeing progress with a fine New Year’s Resolution.

Lifeblood of the Rockies

2007-01-18T23:47:00.000-08:00

I’m currently in a wrestling match with cabin fever, and its’ at its best right now while it boasts its ugly head and gives me nightmares for the next 4 months as I simultaneously marvel yet curse at the newly fallen snow. The kind-hearted, understanding side of me secretly chants “More! More! More snow!” meanwhile right after I repeat these words, my shoulder devil screams, “You fool! The more snow there is, the longer you have to wait until it melts and THEN you get to fish!” Ahhh, gotta love shoulder devils. Aren’t they just wonderful?

I grew up in Utah and though I spent two years of my life chasing people mostly on the plains and Front Range of the Rockies in Colorado, my thoughts have never left the mountains. I long to stand knee-deep upriver and merely gaze at pools as green as the Morning Glory pool of Yellowstone that house the demons of the deep, just waiting to blindside some annelid, sculpin or hexagenia. I often dream of runs that stretch for hundreds of yards and yet only boast one foot of depth where browns and bows stage for spawning and smaller fish compete in the food chain. I love to dapple a Ginger Quill in pocket water that is bursting forth out of a rock up some alpine canyon with voluminous effort. And I love the riffles that carry a Gros Ventre Chernobyl ant into a logjam, taunting the beautiful Snake River Cutt, tempting it with its rosy hues and black legs that seem absolutely irresistible to the indigenous salmonid. Our great Earth has much to offer us. I promise that if you have enough guts to take a voyage into the wilderness with a map, water and 4WD, you will be rewarded very kindly. And yes, I am willing to share these magnificent lands with you. I might even point you in the right direction. My love for these strange yet wonderful places are too close to my heart and assure me that I will never be able to leave the Rockies. My heart will be cloven in two.

Ahhh yes, the mighty and dusky Duchesne. This photo was taken after my friend Steve Hyans landed a beautiful brown trout that was in pre-spawn mode, and had an amazing rusty glow on its pectoral fins. I will never forget the beauty of that trout. Photo by Douglas Barnes.

This is a picture of the Salt River in Star Valley, Wyoming. I am stalking a large brown trout with a Golden Bullethead Stonefly in this shot. Alan Chidester took this photo. You should have seen him salivate at the afterglow of this sunset. Moments earlier, I spotted a 4 point buck in velvet, and his silhouette against this magenta-orange sky was unforgettable. He was a smart deer, for he was hanging out in the valley on the first day of the hunt. It was on Sept 28th that this photo was taken, the day before my birthday. We only caught 3 fish apiece that night, but none under 16 inches. That night I also had the worst case of burning legs from stinging nettle on the walk out. I knew I should have worn my waders!

I’m not telling where this photo is. It’s commonly known as “Secret Riffle” to those of us who know its whereabouts, but I will tell you that this was one of the most fun days of fishing I’ve ever had. Not one fish was over 14 inches, but if you could have seen the colors on these Colorado River Cutts and black-mouthed Brookies, you would gladly drive the 4 hours it takes to get to this totally wild canyon. We were driving through the Uintah Reservation for about 80 minutes and I had to pee so bad my EYES were watering. I have never been so relieved when I saw the National Forest sign and got out and let fly a stream that to this day will never be rivaled. This canyon is the kind of place you keep your wits and eyes about you. We were sure a bear or huge moose were lurking around every corner. It was Labor Day 2003, the first time I fished with Alan Chidester. I learned so much that it’s overwhelming for me to look back on it. We even found a knife that day. It was the first of many knives over the years. We always find knives in the river. Random?

Last but not least, this picture was taken on my birthday of 2004, on the Greys River in Wyoming. I fished that day with Al, and Geordie MacInnis. For the last 4 years I have made the effort to grace this beautiful corridor with my presence during the last week of September, which in my opinion is the most beautiful week of the year. Take note of the autumn colors of the cottonwoods, willows and young aspens. I will not sugar coat it, we didn’t catch a lot of fish that day. I caught one beautiful Snake River Cutt that was about 17 inches long and fatter than a pig, and he destroyed my fly with a few shakes of his enormous head. But wow, it was a beautiful day. And Al and I found some other great streams that day, none that can ever be rivaled to our knowledge. And we have covered the globe. One stream in particular in Wyoming is the perfect stream. I will never find its equal I am 99.9% certain.

Here is a parting shot of a river I found with my friend John Ryder Tanfield Brooks. We have vowed to never reveal its source, but I can give you a hint. It’s covered with rattlesnakes and the strangest looking brown trout I’ve ever seen. And yes, it’s in Utah. I saw a fish on John’s line that leapt 4 feet straight up that day. It was one in a million. The trout itself was only 13 inches long, but it looked like an Australian Black Marlin.

I love flyfishing. I will always love it. If heaven doesn’t have flyfishing, I’m not interested in going there.

A Zoo Fit For A King

2007-01-09T23:16:00.000-08:00

There are two things I miss the most about Nebraska. One is a raven-haired gun totin’ sharpshootin, blue eyed future Olympic Biathlete (now if we can JUST get her on some skiis!), the other is the Henry Doorly Zoo.
I never knew I would be as impressed at the accomplishment than that of the HD Zoo. That animals in captivity could be so well cared for was beyond my comprehension. For the record, I am sitting on the fence when it comes to zoos in general. In this day and age, many of the wild animals of the world are disappearing from their natural environs, and they are being stowed away in cages for the enjoyment of other people for the rest of their lives. Many of their lands are becoming OUR lands and therefore the indigenous species take a backseat while we troll for oil, diamonds and other natural resources we believe will help us achieve whatever goals we have (defiling Mother Earth by extracting the fossil fuels our friends the dinosaurs left for us so we can drive fast @ NASCAR (and I will write about this silly “sport” another time with more pessimistic energy than an angry hornets nest)) , and pillaging rhinoceros horn for sexual aphrodisiacs). At the same time, the change to these wild lands is inevitable, so why not provide the best “home away from home” that we can offer to these local natives we have displaced for the viewing pleasure of all who may walk this way?
And I do suggest going out of your comfort zone and making a voyage to the East African savannah and seeing these animals for your own viewing pleasure. I have done it, and it was worth all the money in the world to see a cheetah bring down a Grant’s gazelle after a 60 mph chase. I was also treated with the spectacle of two lionesses putting the hurt down on a Cape buffalo during a rainstorm while sliding through the mud in a large matatu. I was listening to Enya on my headphones. How’s that for random?
Apparently Henry Doorly was the chairman of the World Publishing Company and his incredibly generous wife Margaret donated $750K in 1963 (which is about $4.5 million these days) and had it named in honor of her husband, but really this is beside the point. But hey, thanks Margie!
We spent the perfect zoo day on a grey balmy Thursday with low clouds and about 50 degrees outside. There were maybe 200 other people at the zoo that day. Perfect. The zoo itself is roughly 150 acres, holds over 17,000 animals, almost 1,000 different species, houses the largest Big Cat complex in North America, and the areas that deserve my greatest attention are 1) The Desert Dome, 2) Lied Jungle 3) Kingdoms of the Night 4) The Aquarium.
Seriously folks, if you ever head this way, plan to spend a day at the HD Zoo. It’s right across the street from Rosenblatt Stadium, home of the World Series of College Baseball. And it’s right on the western shore of the Mighty Missouri River in Omaha, Nebraska.

This is the view I had while flying into Omaha. I couldn’t believe my ears when I heard someone say “That’s the zoo!” The Desert Dome is the world's largest indoor desert at around 42,000 ft (0.96 acres).

Here is another view of the inside. The dome is 137 feet above the main level and 230 feet in diameter. WOW. You have got to see this amazing architectural achievement because it takes your breath away from a mile away!

The Kingdoms of the Night is Tee’s favorite. Imagine walking across bridges over water, with an ambience comparable to that of Pirates of the Caribbean at Disneyland, and throw in opossums, alligators, bats in 70 foot cave, and a 16 foot bottomless pit I almost walked right into! There are beaver dams and large snapping turtles cruising through the world’s largest indoor swamp, and all the while you can hear the animal sounds in the dark.

The Lied Jungle was the first exhibit we saw, and I couldn’t believe my eyes. It’s the largest indoor rainforest in the world, and the building spans over 1.5 acres. The rainforest animals of the 6 major continents are displayed. Among my favorite are the otters, 11 foot crocodile (which I’ve been told has displayed a habit of escaping its pool), and the Clouded Leopard. There are waterfalls, rope bridges to cross and many a wild bird flying through this exhibit. I believe it took us 90 minutes to walk through the whole place!

This is the Aquarium. We were treated to views of cruising Sand Tiger sharks, stingrays, and also a few sea turtles. I love the jellyfish tank, and was also pleasantly surprised to see the weedy sea dragon! I had read about them and had seen them in rare pictures in National Geographic, but to see them up close was an amazing treat! Oh, and I saw seahorses, which are closely related to these crazy weedy sea dragons. I HAVE to include a picture of this wacky specimen.

Oh, what a wonderful way to spend a day in Omaha. The weather was nice, the company was great, and I love it at the HD Zoo. Good job, Omaha! And thanks, Tee! This has to be the best zoo experience ever. In my opinion it ranks higher than the San Diego and the Sydney Zoo.

And a parting shot. This guy was pretty amazing to watch. I can’t even IMAGINE running into a pack of African Wild Dogs the next time I visit Africa!

$6 Million Dollar Man

2006-12-24T18:09:00.000-08:00

I dedicate this post to that once bronzed character of fame: Steve Austin.
As the New Year is on our front porch and knocking fiercely, we all have the opportunity to create new goals for ourselves. While looking in my journal today at church (I know, GREAT usage of time!), I realized that I only fished 19 creeks/lakes/rivers the WHOLE year! This makes 2006 an all-time low. At any other time and in any other circumstance, this would make me sad. This year, I'm happy that I didn't branch out as much geographically whilst waving a fly stick and in the pursuit of besting large salmonids. I hunkered down and learned so much from my education, and I wouldn't trade that for 300 days of amazing fishing.
So besides the obvious goal of exploring more rivers now that I have a marketable trade while paying back my college loans, I am fixin' to create a reachable fitness goal: To get a 6 pack and decrease my body fat percentage.

I am a 6'5 195 lb 31 year old man. I believe my body fat % to be around 18%. I am focusing on dropping that fat and turning it into muscle. In fact, I would like to weigh about 210 by June of 2007. I believe that through a simple plan of hitting the gym 4 times a week, tackling the ever difficult "Herschel Walker workout" (300 pushups, 300 situps in 30 minutes) and running and swimming beyond my heart's desire will help me feel success. At that point that I can look into the mirror in 6 months and imagine the narrator from the 70's action series and hear him say: "Gentlemen, we can rebuild him. Better than he was before. Better…stronger…faster.”

This may mean putting down the Haagen-Daas for the extra bite and eating more peanut butter smothered bananas. But the way I look at it, I accomplished an educational goal that I thought impossible 2 years ago, so why not continue to propel myself into a better world? Why not continue to search through my life and discover either where the wells have run dry, or where there are NO wells to begin with? Might as well break out the shovel and startin diggin' for the jewels of self-discovery, accomplishments and a greater sense of self that will enrich my life and continue to bring me happiness.

"We have the technology. We have the capability to make the world’s first progressive man. Kevin Wright will be that man."

To Assign a Title

2006-12-07T11:26:00.000-08:00

It is high time that I put my thoughts, events and experiences on paper, and since we live in a tree-friendly world, I will pass on the paper and go straight to the web-based world of the eco-friendly internet.
My equal in height, appreciation for trips to SoCal, and sliding down the stairs while reminiscing of Hans Christian Anderson has motivated me to begin my new blog (aka D-Man). And with some much needed help of a plant-drawing sharpshootin' Cornhusker, at 2 a.m. I might add, I have constructed a blog for those privileged individuals and myself to observe while I bounce through the unpredictable and yet so wonderful passages of life.
But before I break ground on my feelings of an amazing life, I will take a step back and tell you a little bit more about the title of my blog.
Back in 1968 (with some direct quotations from Wikipedia, since I cannot find my Structural Bodywork book after my 88% final that I am currently suffering burnout from), R Buckminster Fuller coined the phrase "tensegrity". Tensegrity is a word that massage therapists often use to describe the relationship between the skeletal structure and the fascial lines/muscle fibers of the body. The word itself is a combination of (tens)ion and int(egrity). Or as Wikipedia suggests, "when push and pull have a win-win relationship with each other." Basically, push is divergent, pull is convergent.
I thought this a fitting description of how I want my life to be. Thanks to the capitalistic and social world we live in, we are often pushed to achieve financial security meanwhile exhibiting joy in our recreational pasttimes. I think a lot of my fellow Earthlings share in that fortune cookie wisdom, but I will be honest when I say that I think that the fellows of the "old school" think you should work til you drop, retire and THEN play. For me, I just can't imagine working myself into the ground until I am 65 only to throw my back out and not be able to enjoy my free time. I believe that both goals can be achieved at once. It may wear me out twice as fast, but if I am having fun in the process, well, isn't that the point?

I believe that it is my personal calling in life to bring balance to the life of those I come in contact with, work with and work on, meanwhile bringing balance back to my own. I love the words of a famous writer whose name fails me now, when he said "At the end of my life I want to be thoroughly used up." I also share that same desire, yet will do everything I can to alleviate too much tension and too much compression and therefore, keep my sanity, achieve metaphoric financial peristalsis and find a corner of the earth that is close to moving water and carve out my niche.